HOW TO FIND YOUR SOULMATE - A guide from the experts
If you have the person whom you loved right by your side right now or maybe under the same roof, trust me you are the luckiest person ever. One of my closest friends once candidly told me, ‘Garima, those people are the luckiest on this earth who get to marry the person they fell in love with and have the happily married story.’ I didn’t realize the depth of that statement then, but now I absolutely do. Hence, bringing to the rescue of my lovely ladies, a detailed guide on ‘How to find your soulmate’; though the task is far tougher now than ever before.
We live in an extremely fast paced world right now. Life as we know it is quite different from what our parents or grandparents had lived. Times were far simpler then and so were relationships. Love too had a simpler and maybe a deeper meaning and much lesser complications than now. Finding love is difficult these days and maintaining it through the stressful and highly hectic lives that we lead is even more of a miracle. I know a lot of my friends who have been waiting for that perfect all-consuming love relationship of their lives for years, but just don’t seem to meet the perfect person.
Whenever we run through discussions on the topic of finding love, its mostly the following reasons that we can figure out for our generation not finding the man/woman of their dreams. I am sure if you are single or in a relationship that you still can’t tout as the love of your life, you would have one or the other points to relate to. Would love to hear your thoughts in the comments below.
A Complete Guide on 'How to find your soulmate?'
– We ourselves aren’t that simplified and realistic in our expectations anymore. We all are looking for almost a hundred plus qualities in our partner and that is next to impossible to find. We have set the benchmarks too high and there is an entire checklist of traits that we choose to tick off with a person before falling in love with them. Such relationships based on too much of a calculation generally lack emotion and affection for the long run.
– With the world getting more competitive, the pressures in daily life have increased manifold. The pressure to succeed and achieve big is too high on youngsters these days. With so much to stress about, a lot of young people really do not find the time and energy to invest in another person.
– Don’t know if the online dating apps have further ruined the prospects of finding love or made the process easier. Are they playing the demon or the cupid is difficult to gauge. Ideally, I do not agree that you can find love by just swiping right or left. I mean, that is no way you can get to know about a person. But it is also true, that these apps present you with a lot of people to choose from, which would not have been possible in the physical offline world.
– We are confused. Yes, the generations today are confused and not sure of what they really want. Maybe out of their partners and also out of their relationships. They just keep hoping from one relationship to the other, rather than nurturing some real deep feelings and an unwavering commitment for that one person. Probably, the availability of too many options has also added further to their obscurity on what they truly want.
– Individuality and self-love have today taken the front seat. Though, I am all for self-love and the idea of ‘you don’t pour from empty glasses’. But it is also a fact that you need to nurture and give in selflessly to a relationship to make it blossom. You need to think of each other as one entity and at times also put the ‘us’ and even your partner before ‘me’ or ‘myself’.
– Social media is actually wrecking a havoc on relationships these days. No matter, how many times you scroll down the ‘happily ever after’ or ‘madly in love’ images of the couples online, don’t fall into that trap. Relationships have become far more superficial and hollower than before. Also, a lot of couples end up comparing their normal lives with the picture perfect images of couples online and end up ruining their relationships. Even the most compatible couples lead very normal lives and don’t keep doing fancy stuff all the time. They don’t keep professing their love for each other through dreamy gestures on Social Media. That doesn’t make them any less in love.
– Sometimes bitter experiences also make you turn away from love. As they say, “Once bitten, twice shy.” We need to remember not everyone is the same. If you didn’t meet the right person once, that doesn’t mean that you will never find true love. The answer to this is to learn your lessons and be wiser from your experiences.
– Don’t rush into relationships. Don’t spread yourself excruciatingly thin in the search of that one person who would love you unconditionally. We are all humans and it is our deepest yearning to be loved. But take your time. Know exactly the kind of person you want. At least be sorted on some basic attributes. We all have our types. You would definitely meet that one person, made exclusively for you. But this would require patience. You would meet him/her in the due course of time and then there would be no looking back.
So, love does exist in today’s times but yes to make relationships more meaningful and enriching, it requires much more effort than before. You would probably come across a lot of distractions disguised as the love of your life. But you just have to tread past all of them. Finding love is definitely trickier than before but also do remember, if you are lucky enough to find the ONE, make every effort to make them feel valued, loved and desired unconditionally all through your lives.